Romeo Romeo Go Away Little Freedom Wants To Play

Tales of yore and the puckered lips of the grey-haired have forever narrated us struggles of union. Most of our Bollywood flicks re-iterate this supremely sought-after emotion in innumerable ways. Despite the twisted opinions of what we dearly term as society, our ancient monuments have care, affection and concern either skillfully carved on them by the makers themselves or enamoured by those who found the structures bland. However, right from the times of Anaarkali to Irom Sharmila love in India has never found an easy taker.

Let me try and pen-down one such story which talks about the hurdles associated with having an endearment for your apparent beloved. The plot dates back to 2017 B.C. and is set in an era dominated with kingdoms and provinces. Pieces of land were demarcated and the regions were ruled by kings. There was one supreme leader who oversaw all the kingdoms with the respective kings reporting to him. Among the many unique factors that this era had, one of them was a people-elected king. Rulers here did not belong to royal families but were one among the ordinary.

The story begins with our central character, a hermit, becoming the king of the province of Chauhattar Pardes. Sages and hermits, back in those times, were highly regarded for their lucid lifestyle and detailed knowledge of the scriptures. Apart from being popular, this man was also one of the favourites of the supreme leader because they shared similar interests, which was to disregard anyone who didn’t dress, eat or talk like them.

The newly elected king took over and was quick to realize the perils of the society, the greatest of them being security. He summoned all his officials and asked them to devise a plan to overcome the problem. Intelligent as the officials were, they came up with a roadmap to tackle the iceberg in no time. They issued orders to the king’s army which read:

“Hail the saffron lord.”
We, the core team of the king’s advisory committee have come up with a plan to curb the rising security concerns in our province for which we seek your support and complete adherence. We want you to divide yourselves in teams of five. Each team will station itself in busy and crowded areas of the province which have higher chances of security compromises. All you have to do is DOUBT AND DETAIN. Anyone you feel is a threat to the security of an individual or a group is to be immediately pulled up. We will not wait for a complaint. There may be an “A ji” waiting for his “O ji” or a simple “dost ji” for that matter but we will not risk it, what if he is not. There will be a training session for all of you where we will study about the human body to make it easy for you to identify such offenders just by the looks on their faces.

Although, our job is not moral policing, we are here to protect people but we will act before incidents take a nasty shape and shall therefore ward off dubious characters and the almost dubious ones based only on our doubts and their looks.

Remember doubt and detain! We want to protect all our citizens because we feel offence is not gender specific. However, we will still name the mission as “Heer Bhagao Abhiyaan” because we have latched on to societal norms and generalization and are in no mood to let go. Lastly, we uphold the freedom of our citizens in the highest order and will do nothing to damage that in any way. Still, we will question everybody who is seen loitering around aimlessly because as instructed earlier, prevention is always better than cure. Couples cannot exist unless married. There should no concept of a girl and a boy being together. We encourage friendship but with the same gender. However, digressing, same genders cannot marry.

We hope the instructions are clear. The orders need to be implemented with immediate effect.

Like it or not, we are the best.
Hail the saffron lord.”

The army immediately mobilized and the society became crime free forever thus living happily ever after.

So we see it is not our fault that we cannot stand companionships, it has been trickling down right from the zenith of our ancestral memories. We are not to be blamed. Who is to be?